Unscripted. Unedited. Real. Writing for 5 minutes prompted my a single word from Lisa-Jo.
Go: My style of FMF is to look at the word and type–I don’t look at it, think about, craft something wonderful . . .
Instantly I read, Remember? I’m trying to forget.
I’ve tried to eat my way through the disappointments–why would I want to remember that?
I’ve made bad choice after bad choice–why would I want to remember that?
What I do want to remember is: my wedding day and my first kiss as a bride–my first step to surrender. I want to remember and celebrate each pregnancy . . . no matter how it ended up. I want to remember how blessed I am.
[tweetherder]I want to remember that all I have is this moment, how will I spend it?[/tweetherder]
Be Blessed.
STOP.
my words aren’t coming. I’m confusing remembering a happy moment with living in the past of disappointment. I’m confusing remembering (thinking back on something that happened previously) vs. memories (then entire collected thoughts of a time period).
Please read the post first. The video will take you to youtube away from the site . . . may or may not be annoying. It bugs me so I will try and fix that.
If you do make the dryer balls–when you felt them in the dryer–put them in the bottom of a childs sock (best) or in a pair of knee high nylons (do they make those anymore) or something that will hold it–I did not and I had a huge yarn spaghetti mess . . . I was not a Joyful Mom at that moment.
I have collecting issues. I collect books on knitting, I collect yarn, fabric, quilting books, recipes and cookbooks . . . so you see a trend?
Since this IS my year of intention . . . I am going through all of my “treasures” again . . . I’m getting rid of what doesn’t groove with my intention. We moved 2 years ago and we purged before we moved and still had a semi truck bursting . . . then I vowed to unpack each box and determine if it fit the life we want to have as a family and does it help me live a fulfilled life. Does it add meaning to my life?
I intend to be present with my kids–that has ALWAYS been my intention but when they were babies I had naptimes and bedtimes . . . I still felt like I had a life. Now my day starts with my #4 at 6:30 am and my day ends with my #1 around 10 (sometimes he needs to wake me up). We do chose to homeschool some of our kids and I would not give that up–but by making that choice I really do not have time to knit or quilt! It is busy but I know that I will have no regrets about spending these years with my kids.
I do love to knit–so I do a little each day and now I have a “knitting season” which amazingly coincides with soccer season–as I watch a minimum of 4 hours of soccer each weekend–not to mention the time sitting in the car waiting for kids to start of finish their practices during the week! I also buy yarn for a project and I won’t buy more until I finish the projects that I have.
I want to read more. I read at night before I go to bed. I love my husband’s kindle (the best gift I ever gave him:-)
My house isn’t perfect. This was a huge one! When I let go of the fear of not being a good wife, mother, daughter because my counters could not longer serve as a surgical room or that my floors might not have the vacuum marks on the carpet.
When I gave myself the gift of accepting me for me . . . I felt like I could breath. When I began to live MY life and not someone who I thought had it “all together” is when it became clear that I did have a purpose–but it isn’t to have a perfect house or a perfect butt! It is to be perfect in God’s eyes–to live my life authentically and transparently. I’m still working out the kinks but now I know what I’m working for and WHO I’m working for.
Be Blessed and thank you for taking time to walk with me on my journey. I want to do a vlog tomorrow but I’m not sure on a topic–so if there is something that you are curious about or have a question–leave it in the comments and we will see what happens!
Today I tried something new. I made myself vulnerable. I put out into the world me–in this vlog.
me today!
I’ve wanted to create a video for several different reasons but came up with more reasons NOT to do it. I am scared. I’m not polished, I ramble, I laugh at myself and my corny jokes. But it isn’t really about me, it is about the message that I want to send out into the world.
