What was Mary thinking when she was on her way to Bethlehem?  That was my mantra in 2005.

It was December and I was big as a barn pregnant with my #3 baby.  My husband was in Japan for 8 weeks of my last trimester and I was trying to “manage” two other kids, the house, getting ready for the holidays, getting ready for the baby . . .

(the funny thing–2 kids and being pregnant is a walk in the park compared to my days now–I amazed at how perception changes over time)

It seemed all too much.  Too busy.  So much to do . . . then I thought about Mary and my mantra.  We were both pregnant at the same time of the year and no doubt she was stressed about getting ready for her baby and I was stressed about getting ready for my baby.

At that moment– I remember it so clearly–at that moment Mary became real to me!   I tried each day to do a decade of the rosary–I sort of became stuck on the Annunciation and the Visitation.

The Annunciation simplified is the time where Mary says yes to God.  The Spiritual Fruit of this mystery is humility.  I’ve written may times about surrender and acceptance . . . to God, my husband, clutter,  . . . with my husband gone for 8 weeks during the time when pregnancy hormones were complicating the most simple decision–I can’t just call Japan . . . and ask if I should wear my green sweater or the pink one . . . (I do exaggerate) but I felt like part of me was really missing.  In the surrender, in saying “yes” we experience humility.

We knew well in advance that my husband was going and planned ahead . . . planned meals, events, friends helping out.  In reality–all of that planning went out the window!  My sweet sister-in-law brought me a dinner each week–that was a huge gift.  My in-laws stopped off on their way to and from Delaware–that gift of time and lightening my load gave me back some of the strength that I needed.

I wondered what people Mary had met on the way?  Did anyone lighten her load?

As I began to identify with Mary as a pregnant Mama with her first kid . . . the story of the Nativity became different to me.  When I see Mary smiling at baby Jesus, I see a Mom happy and RELIEVED that everything worked out.

During this year of opening my heart to the true meaning of Advent–to prepare, to be still, to focus on hope, love, joy, and peace of the season.  Now, 8 years later our home is filled with many, many Advent traditions.  Some years we do more than others–and I like to mix things up.

This is our 2nd Advent in this house so we are still working out how to keep what we had in the old house and start new ideas in this house.  The year before that we had our house on the market and we tried to keep the house “festive” so that it would sell but not “too Jesus” . . . I had to really compromise with my realtor on that!  So we kept “Jesus in a box” and if we had a showing we would gather up as much stuff as we could and put it in the box–have the showing and then put it all back out . . . I am very happy that we will not have to do that this year!

This is how our family celebrates Advent.

The Wreath.  I have several advent wreaths and I have written about how to make some as well.  I love wreaths year round–I have two simple wreaths on my front door in purple and pink.  They don’t match–I found the decorations on clearance and what I had in my basement.

The Table.  We eat in the dining room every Sunday throughout the year.  (my own way of helping keep it clean)  During Advent I have the table set and ready to go–the dishes go right from the dishwasher onto the table.  We have a purple table-cloth and a white and silver table-cloth during Advent.

The Centerpiece.  New this year I have a beautiful wooden wreath–from Caleb Voskamp.  I can’t wait to move Mary, Joseph and the donkey closer and closer to the center.  I will have purple candles, a pink candle and the very last/center will be a white candle.

The Candles.  I have several Advent wreaths that the kids have made over the years and they hold memories of Christmas’ past.  I have the traditional Advent circle wreath with the 4 candles coming up from the base.  I had purple Christmas bulbs and beads to jazz up the greenery.  The problem is that it took up way too much of my table–so last year I bought a new Advent candle–it is long and skinny and fits perfectly into the table.

The Prayers.  I bought a book called “Let’s Say Grace” by Robert M. Hamma and I use it ALL the time.  During Advent it has a special prayer for each Sunday and then weekday prayers.  This year, I’m planning on writing my own prayers based on hope, love, joy and peace.

The Rosary.  Studying the joyful mysteries during this time seems to bring them alive!

The Bible.  Sort of–in the past few years I have read “In Conversation with God” by Francis Fernandez–each day I spend with my oldest child and we read–sometimes we talk about it, sometimes we just sit quietly.  I look forward to this time with him–growing in our faith together in this special way.

The Calendar.   The idea of a piece of candy each day of Advent multiplied by the number of my kids was . . . not the direction that I wanted to take (I did use leftover Halloween candy–but still).  So last year I bought a calendar box–not sure what I was going to do with it.  Now I have a plan!  I fill it with Ann Voskamps Giving tree printables.    Each day they take out a leaf, memorize the verse, THEN they get a piece of candy.

The Thankful Tree.  Once the kids have taken out the verse, memorized the verse–they get to put their name on the back of the leaf and hang it on our “thankful tree”.  If they don’t memorize the verse than can still write down what they are thankful for and put it on the tree.

The Food.  Last year we made Advent cupcakes–very time-consuming but very fun and totally cute.  This year I’m going to get a wreath cookie cutter or use a combination to make a heart wreath or a star wreath (those are the cookie cutters that I know I have) and decorate them–purple and pink.  On the third Sunday of Advent I’m planning on serving pink lemonade.

Simplicity.  I can be a sort of “over the top” person–I can turn the easiest most simple thing . . . in an EVENT.  This year I’m keeping it simple.  I’ve planned, for sure, but I’m not going to drive myself crazy.

Our family has certainly grown and changed how we have celebrated Advent over the years.  My goal is to make this an intentional time–a time to slow down when the world seems to be winding tighter and tighter.

Be Blessed.