I’m reposting this . . . because I’m missing my Mom.

I love cooking.  I love food.  I love the smell of cooking.  I love dinner time with all my kidlings sitting around the table and laughing, talking about their day, enjoying the moment of being together.

Before kids I cooked very elaborate meals both at home, in my catering and in the various restaurants that I worked in.  Now my meals are less complex but still delicious and wholesome.  Over the years I have worked with some awesome chefs and I have always kept lots of recipes.  Too many really for one person to ever cook in “real life”.

One day I decided to get rid of the zillion cookbooks that I had and just keep the recipes that I used.  I found a 3 ring binder and began filling the page protectors with my favorites.  Some of these included recipes from my wedding shower (I had asked for a fat quarter of fabric and a recipe) these heirloom recipes are so wonderful to have and I really do treasure them.  I did make a beautiful wedding quilt as well.

I have continued to add to this three ring binder as I try new recipes that everyone enjoys.  I have also started writing down the recipes that I want my kids to have.  You see when my Mom died she had lots of cookbooks and tons of handwritten recipes.  It is so special to follow a recipe that is in her handwriting–it feels like she is really with me in my kitchen.  My mom also had tons of recipes stuck in books that were held together with rubber bands.  The year after my Mom passed I decided to replicate all of her Christmas cookies–she made dozens of different kinds–no exaggeration, plus fudge and chocolate covered cherries–crazy amounts of baking.  I had success except for her date pinwheels.

I tried every date pinwheel recipe and none of them tasted like hers.  I don’t even LIKE them but I felt consumed to find that one cookie recipe.  I gave up.  I gave up on chasing a memory of a cookie.  It wasn’t really about the cookie, it was about sharing something with my Mom after she was gone.

What I want for my kids is to have the recipes that I use.  I want them to work with me in the kitchen, not only because it makes it more fun for me but I want them to have something that I don’t have.  I want them to have my muffin recipe.

I make muffins every two weeks–24 muffins and I freeze 18.  You see every week we have Muffin Monday.  I usually make pumpkin or banana–it needs to be predictable for the kids.  I always have 3 weeks worth of muffins in the freezer.  It lightens my mental load to know that one breakfast every week is taken care of with food the kids love.

Thank you God for giving me the gift of organization so the my house might run smoother giving me even more time to serve you.  Thank you for giving me the gift of cooking and nourishing those closest to me.  With Your grace I hope that I can feed their souls as well as their stomachs.